Scientists found out when it's best to text a potential partner after a first date

Texting the next morning after a first date is the optimal strategy for continuing communication. This is the conclusion reached by an international team of researchers. The study was published in the Journal of Social and Personal Relationships (JSPR).

A first date plays a key role in forming attraction and evaluating a potential partner. However, after the meeting, a question arises: when is the best time to reach out. In popular culture, there is, for example, the "three-day rule," which suggests waiting so as not to appear too interested.

To test this scientifically, a team led by Lars Teichmann conducted an experiment involving more than 500 people from the US and the UK. Participants were asked to imagine a date after which a potential partner texted either immediately, the next morning, or two days later.

The results showed that the greatest interest in continuing the relationship arose specifically in the case of a message the next morning. Immediate contact was perceived slightly less favorably, while a two-day wait significantly reduced the desire to continue communication.

Additional analysis showed that the effect is related to the perception of the partner. A quick response (immediately or in the morning) signals interest and reliability, whereas a delay creates an impression of indifference.

"Our data show that an early message works better, but the optimal timing turns out to be the next day: it preserves the sense of interest and enhances the desire to continue the relationship. Too long a pause, on the contrary, has the opposite effect," the study authors noted.

Interestingly, the strategy of "playing hard to get" did not prove effective: waiting did not increase a person's "value" in the partner's eyes and did not make them think about the person more.

The authors emphasized that the study is based on hypothetical scenarios, and in real life other factors also matter — the content of messages, communication style, and cultural context. Nevertheless, the work shows that when it comes to the first message after a date, a "golden mean" truly does exist.